Because I have experience of this area of ministry. And my husband believes in me. Because I 've got this! Because it's a good fit and the right time. Aren't those the reasons we're meant to do something? Aren't we supposed to have knowledge, gifting, and the right heart before we are ready for a position of leadership?
It's too bad that a few months into it, I realized any explainable reasons why I'd been called to this role were held hostage and made useless by fear and anxiety.
So much for having a passionate vision of the future; for seeing all the pieces work together and helping the team to get there; for boldly making strides forward; for any of the practical reasons leaders are leaders. I was anything but.
But then again, maybe I was called because I was afraid. Maybe God held my earthly qualifications back because he wanted something else to wrestle in this fight. Perhaps I am meant to be weak so that the only thing that could be said in response to people appreciating what we do is "God makes me able."
So here we go, team; I am your fearful leader.